**Devotees of Dionysos**
Have you always been an outsider? Someone who sees things differently?
Feeling stifled in your career? Ready to shake up your life?
Do you value freedom above all else?
This is the job for you!
Open to men, women, and any persons other or between
Near infinite number of positions available in a variety of divisions and branches, both traditional and innovative - your unique talents are needed!
Applicants should be foolhardy, visionary, willing to bend and break rules and
go beyond their comfort zones.
Must be willing to endure occasional (sometimes extreme) physical demands
Including but not limited to dance, fasting, ingestion of mind-altering substances, extreme art, little and big ego deaths.
Outdoor work will be necessary!
Very flexible hours! Design your own schedule!
No health benefits or life insurance,
however other benefits may be available on a case by case basis,
depending on your perspective and the discretion of management. (Can be generous.)
Ask about our exclusive afterlife plans!
Criminal history? Mental health issues? Identity or mid-life crisis? No problem!
Willingness to travel or relocate is a plus,
as is a willingness to lose everything.
New devotees must give away their heart to the god on the first day.
What are you waiting for? Act now to take advantage of this mythic opportunity.
Please Inquire Within!
[Printed on the side of a bottle.]